A Final Farewell

A Final Farewell

In just a few short hours we will all say goodbye to Phil's hill--a place that holds the very heart and soul of our dad. For as long as I can remember, my dad talked about owning a place on a mountain. He enjoyed wildlife, fishing, hearing birds chirp, trees and the quietness of the mountains.




Summer 2012

He finally got that wish in 1999/2000 when he purchased 10 acres of land in the mountains north of the city of Lock Haven, PA. he spent many weekends travelling 4 hours to build the cabin he wanted. In December 2010, he took his last trip there (unknowingly), locked up the house for the winter with hopes to return in early spring and finish building the inside.  Spring 2011 came, the tree leaves bloomed, the grass grew, the birds chirped, the animals came out of hiding, but Phil did not return. Left behind were tools, coffee beans and mugs, boots and other miscellaneous items.

Stream by Phil's Hill

Over the past four years, it was visibly difficult for any/all of us to visit Phil's hill. I know for me, the thought of moving his tools and other belongings was too much to deal with emotionally. So, I chose to avoid everything including his mountain property. I went once in the summer of 2012 and being there was too much-I left without a desire to go back and face the reality. My mom recently made the decision that it was time for us to sell the place and move forward with positive and happy memories of the times we spent there.

Last family photo at Phil's hill

This past weekend my sisters, mom and I sat at Phil's hill with a mixture of emotions that ranged from laughing with happy memories of past trips to sadness to have to let go of such a monument of our dad.  This past weekend was special though. It was a special time for us all to bond and hold close our own personal memories of a great man that was lost four years ago. My sister's and I spent Friday sorting through items, selecting which  we wanted to bring back to our own homes and remembering the fun trips we had in the past.

I took as many pictures as I could, listened to the sound of chirping birds, smelled the mountain air, touched each wall of the cabin and  breathed in as much of the present as I could, took one last look around and quietly left. As we pulled out of the driveway, I watched the house fade in the side view mirror,  I quietly sad goodbye to my dad.

Ideas for the house

Ideas for the house

Cardinal

Siblings

Last view of the hill

Many of you may not understand the pain and heartache that follows the death of a parent--it's unexplainable. Visiting Phil's hill one last time gave me the opportunity I have been looking for the past four years--the opportunity to formally say "goodbye". Till we meet again Papa... XOXO.

Phil happy as can be on his new mower

Note: Written July 2015.